Women Seeking Men SEAHAG SEEKS SEAHUNK Buxom blonde half fish, half demonic sea-witch seeks hung, 45-50 Captain D type to come sail these waters. Interests include football, sewing, and entering tough-man contests. -SHR770* ENORMOUS BREASTS... but only one leg - we all have to make trade offs! Redheaded vixen, slightly damaged seeks dream-lover, 11-15, into drag racing, fine cheeses, and the growing plastics industry. CALL NOW! -TIF360* HAVE ALL YOUR TEETH? You won't after I'm through with you, you fucking fairy. I'm gonna kick your ass straight out your fucking mouth, you worthless bag of rat shit. SWF, somewhat shy, out to cut your miserable little pansy-ass whining throat. I hate you! -CRZ812* MAGNUM P.I.'S IN DA HOUSE DAF, superhuman strength, eye-sight, hearing seeks small, annoying British man to be own personal "Higgins". Must be able to think quickly in tense situations and know how to pilot large flying robots. LTR possible. -PWR562* Are your testes swollen with passion? Mine are. Hi, I'm Olivia! I'm 25, blonde, and indistinguishable from the real article. Call me for the night of a lifetime! -DUD112* "AYE CARAMBA!" - Does this phrase crack you up every
single time you hear it like it does me? If the answer is yes, then I'm
your red-hot firecracker gal. Hey - AYE CARAMBA! Ha ha ha, it's so hard
to laugh and write at the same time! -WCK069* |
Men Seeking Women ATTN: ALL FAT BITCHES! I got a cock as long as my fuckin' arm over here. What the fuck are you waiting for? I wanna hose you down baby and give to you this fat salami! Badda bing! (Offer not available in Wisconsin.) -AML289* RICH CORN VENDOR seeks tall, loving SB/HF with small strong fingers for de-kerneling delicious golden ears of corn. Minor humiliation, B/D. $5.50/hr. -HSK340* PARLEZ-VOUS FRANÇAIS? Je ne parles pas français. Si vous parlez français á moi, je detesterais vous. Vous etes un grande mouton et un "show- off". Je veux que tu es mort! -FRN781* PEOPLE SAY I'M A WEREWOLF Boy are they wrong! I'm really just very, very hairy and I howl a lot. I'm looking for that special woman who won't shoot at me when I'm in the mood to act, merely act, like a werewolf. Sagitarians encouraged to reply. WLF676* UNHAPPY, INACTIVE MALE confined to iron lung for rest of rotten, stinking life seeks gorgeous, perky breasted, goddess-type with good fashion sense for dinner and a drink. Call me. -CRP108 Women Seeking Women TORO! TORO! Hardcore bull dyke seeks similar hardcore bull dyke for serious bump n' grind and witchcraft sessions. Underdeveloped language skills and permanent scowling glare required. Race unimportant, but evil penetrating blue eyes are. Let's Rock! FEM550* HI MY NAME IS HANK Now I'm no "lebian", but I know a thing or two about real lovin', and one thing I know for certain is I love this country, the Unibed Spates of Alerica. Now you females wanting to be Lebians and leave this fair country are just plain concfused. What you really need to clean your clocks is good down home COUNRTY MUSIC! It's good for what ails ya. -HLL542* PORPOISE GIRL seeks similar porpoise girl. I'm looking for my
soulmate, the one who knows the pains of living in a heterocentric society
as well as the perils of the tuna nets. I'm looking for that special one
who's is as unafraid to flaunt her love for someone of the same gender as
she is to ram her snout into an attacking killer whale. Please, won't you
answer my prayers? -PRP808* |
Men Seeking Men HOT, SCALDING HOT GWM seeks attractive, sensible, hard, hot, circumsized, and hairy "pool boy" to "clean my pool" and "wash my dishes". Also expect to "do my laundry" and "vacuum the carpet". May occasionally be expected to "drive the kids to the bus stop". I'm sizzling! -WRK337* HOMO ON THE RANGE I'm just a down home guy who likes to play with other down home guys as well as deers and antelopes. If your the type of guy who knows what I mean and can overlook my severe disfiguration from being kicked and gored several times, then call me. -HRT536* SURE I'M GROSSLY OBESE, but that doesn't mean I can't indulge in my fetish for extremely elderly men. If you are between the ages of 73 and 408 and resemble the character Yoda from the Star Wars movies, then my nipples are stiffening for you as we speak. Let me provide the care a nurse isn't allowed to give, you old, dusty, beginning of time, decrepit, toothless grin having, drooling on yourself, Depends undergarment wearing, old stinky fart man. I'll love you like you need to be loved! -OLD408* Other 1973 MW JOHN DEERE Lawnmaster 440 Riding Mower, exc. cond. $520.00. Blades need sharpening. Call "Tits". -GRS411* DPHM LOVES ACRONYMS seeks G/Bi/SMPJW/B/HC into S/M, B/D, G/S,
M/F, IOU, MADD, NRA, NWA, TWA, CIA,, NPR, PLO, IRA, IRS, SOS, MD, DDS, PHD,
CBO W/O VD or STD's. DDF, TDD only. Interested? Look for a call from Marc
Cuevas on your AT&T Caller ID. Around 6PM. -FBI069* |